Maybe One Goat In Hell?

For years now, I have taken exception with several priests, who have insisted on characterizing goats as stubborn, mischievous, and evil.  They seem to fall into this error, as they try to unpack Christ's parable of the final judgement. Matthew 26: 32, 33  "And he will separate them one from another, as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats.  He will place the sheep on his right and the goats on his left."  Those on the left are later banished, "Depart from me, you accursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels."  Matt. 26:42

My complaint is that Christ's point is simply that there is a difference: a difference between a goat and a sheep, as there is a difference between someone who lives for Christ, and someone who does not.  The urban view of goats just naturally makes an easy target for a homily on unacceptable behavior, which is bound to land you in hell.  For the most part though, I have found goats to be good natured, trainable, and humorous.   I have raised both sheep and goats, and if I had to send either to hell, it would surely be the sheep, with one exception, "Redneck". 

I started writing this blog at 2:30 am after returning from my dental office, where I cut-off my wedding ban of 37 years.  Earlier in the day I had attempted to give two of my three goats their worming medicine.  Redneck, named for her reddish brown neck on her otherwise white coat, has always been a tad skittish.  I had her penned in a stall.  Just as I grabbed her collar, she broke away, and jammed my ring finger.  It hurt, but I hoped I could walk it off.  I kept hoping until pain woke me at 1:30 a.m., and my ring was obviously tighter against the slightly swollen finger.  Luckily I have high speed drills at my office, in which a diamond-chip burr cuts through metal rather easily.

I will always take exception to this common clerical cut on goats, but if I am unable to register my complaint, I'll just figure he's referring to Redneck.